so i feel pretty sick and i decided i would take a nap
which i did
until 8 pm
i woke up about 10 minutes ago and used the bathroom and all that jazz and was like ‘damn im hungry’ so i go into the kitchen and i am greeted with 3 slices of pizza. no, those were no ordinary 3-cheese-pepperoni-and-mushroom slices of pizza like i thought. what i was happily greeted with were fucking anchovies. satan’s secret topping. mother fucking anchovies. i bit into that slice of pizza and came the flavor that would soon drag me to hell itself. these fucking fishy-ass slivers of cruelty to pizza around the world were the saltiest, nastiest fucks ive ever out in my mouth. now, this is where my dad comes in to greet me from my nap, but instead laughs at my misery as im washing out the sorrow sack of shit called food in my mouth. he then tells me that the one slice of pizza i ate was the only one left that had anchovies. he proceeds to offer me the good pizza, which i deny, because satan’s little grimy fingers have been all over it.
tl;dr: i just wanted some god damn pizza and anchovies can suck a huge bag of dicks.
